My five top tips for writing with kids
It drives me a little bit crazy when I hear writers discuss the strict writing regimen they must follow to get the job done. Many authors talk about writing as though it’s a job where you can clock on in the morning, then clock off in the afternoon having written many thousands of words.
What writer wouldn’t love that?
When his last book, Origin, was released a few years ago, Dan Brown told the New York Times his writing process requires that he adhere to a strict routine to produce his action-charged, #1 bestselling thrillers.
He wakes at 4am every day and makes himself a smoothie consisting of blueberries, spinach, banana, coconut water, seeds and pea protein. He also makes ‘bulletproof’ coffee with butter and coconut oil, ingredients Brown says enhance ‘the way your brain processes the caffeine’. By midday he has clocked off with eight hours of writing under his belt. During these eight hours, Brown also manages a 60-second set of push-ups or sit-ups each hour.
Unfortunately, most people with normal lives, and particularly those who have children, rarely enjoy this type of monastic routine and blinkered devotion to the craft, or to their abs.
Likewise, the children’s author Tristan Bancks reckons he’s able to write thousands of words on his phone whilst enjoying his early-morning, solitary walk along the beach.
What?! What a talent!
When I get the chance to walk along a beach, I usually have two kids and a dog in tow. Striker is typically shooting soccer balls at my head while Dexter (not a strong swimmer) is making death-defying runs into the shallows. Meanwhile, Mick (lovable, loyal and lunatic Staffy) is jerking me this way and that, in his relentless pursuit of seagulls.
Even if I was dictating my manuscript into my phone, how could I possibly focus?
Clearly, I don’t have Dan Brown’s myopic dedication to writing and nor do I possess Bancks’s Jedi-like capacity for avoiding obstacles whilst walking and typing.
I teach part-time and I have two kids. So on the five days per fortnight I’m not teaching, I write. This means dropping Dexter at school in the morning then racing home for some time in front of my computer. My workday ends at 2.50pm when I depart for school pick-up. This leaves approximately 15 hours each week for writing. Minus any unforeseen occurrences – kids home from school sick, tradies in the house, unexpected visitors – this leaves roughly 12 to 13 hours each week.
And as for the school holidays …
What’s more, I don’t have a secluded office space (see pic). Since the birth of Dexter, my writing space is in the family room. And no matter how many times I explain to people that this corner at the end of the room is my office space, they still treat it like a thoroughfare, soccer pitch, restaurant or gaming room. As a result, it’s VERY difficult to write when the kids are home.
But I’m positive I am not on my own in this regard. Surely, there are writers - women and men - struggling to write with kids in the house.
So how have I written seven books, with kids?
A typical day in the office
1. Seize the moment: Take advantage of every opportunity when the house is quiet. When the kids are not home or even when there are only a few hours (or just a few minutes!) of serenity, WRITE, WRITE, WRITE. Writing mums do not have the luxury of waiting for the muse to call. You cannot waste any moment. The boys’ shower/bath time in the evening is ample time for me to write 500 to 1000 words. Strangely, I find this time very productive. I’m not a night owl, but many writing mothers wait for the kids to bed down before they’re able to become super productive.
2. No pressure: Don’t place pressure on yourself to hit a certain number of words each day - this will only make you frustrated. I am happy with whatever I’m able to write each day. I know it means I have moved forward with the manuscript. On some occasions, I might write 5000 words. On others I’ll write just 250. But every word is a step in the right direction.
3. Write every day: On the days I’m teaching, I attempt to write something. Even during school holidays, I attempt to write something every day. This may not be the manuscript I am working on. It might be a blog post or even a Facebook post. I can’t write at school. School is my teacher world. To write, I need my desk and my space, even if that isn’t a secluded and enclosed office space like many writers possess. I need my writer’s world. It’s a little like having a secret identity, or a Bat Cave.
4. Walk it out: While I’m far too clumsy to write while walking (I’m very prone to falling over, even on level surfaces and with nothing in my hands), I am able to do a great deal of plotting, problem solving and writing in my head, especially dialogue, whilst walking Mick in the morning. Although words are not filling the screen, they are filling my head. I find the transference of those ideas to the page is fast, furious and ultra-efficient once I’m home and in front of my computer. Walking is my meditation. It clears my head and focuses my thoughts.
5. Avoid distractions: The recent period of remote learning and isolation during which the entire family was home every day was incredibly productive for me. During ‘recess’ and ‘lunch breaks’, I’d send the boys outside to play and I’d write. In the afternoon, Coach would take them to the oval for a kick and I would write. The words would flow so freely that my fingers could barely keep up with my thoughts. This unexpected, joyous fecundity occurred because there were no other distractions. Apart from the worry about where our next roll of toilet paper was coming from, life was simple. When I was alone, I could focus solely on my writing. Furthermore, the downtime offered me plenty of time to think – to do what I typically would do when walking (see point 4). Now this ‘iso’ lifestyle is coming to a close, I’m aiming to retain it, as much as possible, when it comes to my writing.